Sunday, June 19, 2016

Embrace your flaws

This post may sound super profound, but it really isn't. It's just me venting.

So I recently had a friend of mine come up to me (randomly) and say, "I've been reflecting...the person I am, is not who I am supposed to be. I mean, I say these things and do these things without thinking...and maybe it's time I started thinking. Be more considerate. I mean, otherwise I could just get into a lot of trouble."

Which got me thinking...why does she want to change? What made her think this way? Did someone tell her something? I didn't ask her, because sometimes people just want you to listen, and not react.

I understand that we tend to find "flaws" with ourselves and want to change them for the better. But sometimes I think that these flaws are what make us who we are. Without these flaws, we'd be someone else. Conversely, what you may see as a flaw in yourself could be seen as a great positive through someone else's eyes.

I guess, at the end of the day, we're all on the same quest in the journey of life...looking for someone who'll accept us for who we are. I don't believe in changing your personality traits for someone. Changing habits, yeah that's possible, if it's for the better. But your personality...no. If someone is telling you to be less talkative, be more social, avoiding conversations around your topics of interest, asking you to do things that they like but never doing things you like...that's not a healthy relationship. And that's not compromise either.

So to my friend, you know who you are, if you're reading this, don't change one bit. Your blatant and brutal to-the-face honesty is something I appreciate, and what the world needs more of.

And to my small group of readers, think of someone who has a unique personality trait, or just a usual one..maybe they've felt insecure about it or avoided talking about it due to afraid of being judged...text/call them and compliment them, genuinely.

...and next time a person wants to talk about their interest, and they utter the words "I'm sorry, am I boring you?"...remember, they're only asking that because they've been told that this particular interest of theirs is boring. So just listen. We live in a narcissistic world where everything is about "me me me". It's time we used our social platforms to create a world of equality, consideration and empathy.

...which is what I'm trying to do with this post.  

Tuesday, May 3, 2016

Why you so happy?

Social media plays quite the role in how our lives sort of...form, in today's world. And as basic instinct, we're very used to sharing positive news on Facebook. Maybe it's a psychological thing...I mean of course it is - we very rarely tend to share bad news on social media, unless it be the death of someone close.

Our social media personalities are the epitome of who we want to be - the ideal self - which is why we tend to post more news/updates that are inclined to positive thoughts. We want those likes. It's a confirmation that you're pretty, or that you getting into xxx college is a great thing, or that being in a relationship with some idiot is a good thing (okay not everyone you date is an idiot...)

Of course, we're not all like this. Some people like to use social media as lurkers...which is worse. Lurkers just observe other people, maybe occasionally liking a picture or two, but you tend to forget that this person even exists on a social media platform. The sad thing about lurkers is that we tend to observe other people's happening lives, and automatically assume ours is...boring, depressing, uneventful...whereas we forget that those who post actively are not posting moments of them doing nothing.

This is kind of why I like snapchat...I mean it started off as an app to send naked snaps of people, but now it's an app that gives me the sense of belonging. I'll snap my mundane breakfast of cereal, and my friend will snap back the exact same thing! Also, snapchat is a place where not so pretty selfies are acceptable...and appreciated :)

And that's how it should be generally. I don't step out of the house in a pretty red dress, scarlet lips and curled eyelashes everyday...like my Facebook profile picture displays everyday. We need to accept the good and the bad. It's great that we're more than excited to share happy news on Facebook or Twitter...but we can't assume a person is always happy because of their social media posts. Everyone has their ups and downs, and using social media as a platform to judge how "good" people's lives are is just...not right.

Why did I post this? I saw a picture of two of my friends on Facebook, posted a month after their huge argument. The catch is, they still talk to me individually about this fight and have not really...moved on.

Your thought after reading this post? "Who are these two friends? Am I one of them? Shit."

...ahh the power of psychology :)

<goes back to Facebook and stares at happy lives of people>
<cries self to sleep>

Friday, January 15, 2016

Your Passion Defines You

Sometimes I feel like we take our hobbies and/or passions for granted. We don't realise how they define us as a person, keep is grounded, sane and stable. Yes, we have people in our lives to help us do this too, but sometimes self exploration is the best way to discover something new about yourself.

Why am I writing about this? I haven't written in three months. And for someone who claims to be a passionate writer, this is the worst example to set. Not writing for three months has not damaged who I am, but it has definitely affected certain aspects of my creative process.

When I used to write regularly, I used to keep note of every idea in my small notebook. This helped have a creative flow to my writing or just some genuinely interesting things to discuss. Now, if I do get an idea, I'm at work or in the auto going home. I don't have anywhere to write...and it never occurred to me to keep note of it on my phone because I like to physically write these things down. Because of this, I've let so many good ideas go. 

Recently, I decided enough is enough. I need to get this blog up and running. Not for the handful of readers (who I appreciate), but for me. For my sanity. For me to have my venting portal back. Depending on family and friends for venting is great. But you cannot deny that they will never understand the whole of it. But they will support you and be there for you.

But your passion, be it writing, reading, baking, cooking, photography, drawing...this will allow you to see things more clearly. The process of your passion relaxes you, allowing you to have a clearer perspective of things. So let your passion define you and allow you to surpass all your fears and frustrations. 

Tell me, what's your passion??