What Hath Come Of the World?!

<insert dramatic face here>

I always complain about how my parents don't understand me because of the major generation gap. They don't understand why I am always on my phone...or laptop...or iPod...or anything really. They always ask me to make use of my time and do things constructively. Use time productively. Having aims and goals in life.So on and so forth.

I hated those long lectures. It's bad enough I have my own philosophical thoughts going on in my head, with my parents yapping away on the other end about reality of life.

But today, as I was reading an article about how one should live in their 20s (it was directed at the male audience, but I think readers are sane enough to generalise and adapt some of the points to our situation...or in this case, gender), I realised how correct my parents were.

What's stupid is, it was an article that made me realise this. What's sad is, we have people writing articles to tell us how to live. I mean, I don't think my parents, or their parents, or their parents' parents read articles and lead life. And they turned out to be perfectly fine!

Which is why I generally do not appreciate the media and technology. They influence our thoughts waaaaay too much and we start to have this weird cyber personality. I can talk a shit load here on my blog and on Facebook and Twitter, but stare at you like a wide eyed raccoon in person and say nothing.

Having said all that, it's ironic. Because I am a media student. And this is technology that I'm using to convey this message. What hath come of the world? Where it just goes around in circles? The quest for answers hath lost its meaning. There are no answers. Just circular journeys. 

Comparisons

I think it is normal human nature to have the need to compare. We compare our clothes, appearances, things, work load and so on.

But can you imagine life, if for once, we didn't compare how one is better or how one is worse? If we could just sit and be happy about the half a chocolate we have? Why is there the constant need to compare?

And let me bring in the technological factor of today: Social Networking. It's a good thing...but reality is that we've articles (some useful, some not so useful) circulating about the most random shit on earth. I recently read an article about why Montreal is better than Toronto. Fair enough article; but not when your arguments are based on a better party and booze life.

Another thing we all (students) tend to do is compare the amount of workload we have. Why? Are we trying to make the other person feel bad that we're working more? Who are we kidding? We spend half our time procrastinating on Facebook, YouTube, Twitter and our beds; and the other half cribbing about the amount of work we have. If we cut off one of two, preferably the latter, we'd have enough time to do the "work" we crib about.

As I mentioned earlier, comparing is human nature. Sometimes I think that without comparisons, we'd have no motivating factor. For example, when my friend complains to me about the amount of work he has, I realise that I, too, have work (probably not the same amount) and actually get that work done because I feel guilty that he has more work than I do. Which is probably not the case anyway.

As for comparing places...don't even go there. That's probably the most stupidest thing to do. Places are different...they hold different cultures, historical facts, people, food, architecture...everything. It's like comparing a potato and a carrot...they're both vegetables. Let them be bro.

Act!

What do I do instead of writing my essay? I blog. It’s a good stress buster. As is Twitter. Just saying.

Anyway. This blog is going to be a rather serious one. Only because it got me thinking. Now, before you get all critical, offensive and defensive, this blog is not targeted at anyone. It’s just my general thought. I may be wrong for all I know as I do not know what’s going on in your minds.

So going abroad and studying? Best experience ever. But, where are my qualifications going to play their part? My home. I have two homes so I’ll probably try and incorporate both. But no matter how much I say I am Zambian at heart, I am also partly Indian. And I love India. The culture, food, people, ambiance  traffic, dust, shopping…what’s not to love?

Point being, I am studying abroad. But I want to use this education to help make my country better. Why should I stay here and make a good place even better when I need to improve my country? I am not saying my country is bad. It’s not. In fact, it’s far from bad. Sure we have certain happenings that are not acceptable in society. It’s not like all the other countries in the world have no crime, rape, murders, etc. They do. We’re just not aware of it.

Use opportunities wisely. Don’t improve the good. Improve what needs improvising. Don't complain. Act. Give back to your country for a better future. 

The Rape Case

The People;

The lower class, unaware

The middle class, aware but no time

The upper class, aware, have time to protest

But, no results.

The Media;

News sensation, exaggeration

What is the reality?

Blowing out of proportion

New stories: Has Bollywood got to do anything with this? 
Are the media to blame?

Again, no results.

International viewers;

Sympathise, discuss

Look down upon India

It does not affect them;

Again, no results.

Social Media;

Endless RIP tweets,

Sharing n number of notes and photographs about the case

Organising walks and protests

All lasted for a few weeks.

Today? Hardly anything seen on my newsfeed.

What’s the point?

Was justice served?

Was it served despite all these expressions, protests, walks, news, reactions, discussions?

What really happened?

R.I.P, the woman who fought, the woman who awakened India with her sleep.

Use and Throw

Having lived in this world for 20 years, I now know the value that people hold. Yes. Being 20 can make you wise. Okay, maybe not. But trust me, I  may know more at my age than my parents did when they were my age. This is all thanks to the developments in technology and something called "Google" that helps me search for everything...even ridiculous things.

Thanks to development, we are all self obsessed. Yes. I am too. This is why I have this blog. And 10 different profile pictures on Facebook of just me. Without anyone else. I am self obsessed. I like to tell my stories. I like to talk about my experiences. I like to take pictures of myself (please don't give me that look. I know you do too. At least I don't do it in the bathroom!). I like to update my Facebook status and get many likes. I like to see the number of followers on Twitter increase. I like to see the number of blog views increase. I AM SELF OBSESSED.

However, last night, I noticed how being self obsessed has turned me into someone I am not. It has changed me from that nice small town girl to some spoiled brat that only cares about...well...herself? It's not that I don't listen to other people's problems and stories. I do. But I immediately think of a story that relates to me. Which is sad.

This brings me to my next point. This post is not going to just criticize me; it's going to criticize all my friends too. Yes. You guys. Well not in specific. But you may want to think about it. The number of times I have tried to keep in touch with people is uncountable. But their side of the effort is not even 1/8th of mine. The number of times I have sent a 'good morning' message to my friends is again uncountable. But never once have I received the same. The number of times people have come to me for help is uncountable. But when I ask for the same, they're all busy.

I had a friend, 4 years back, who had the same issue with me. It was then that I told her, "In friendship, you don't expect the other person to return favours." Clearly I was wrong. It's not meant to be favours. If it is a favour, it's not friendship. All actions have to be based purely on care. In any relationship.

With that, I'll end by saying, do not ruin your character by getting too involved in technology. Give time for the reality of life to sink in. Because once reality hits you, you may not be able to face it.

NB: The examples given above are purely fictional. Please do not relate to them or find them offensive. 

HIGH EXPECTATIONS = HIGH DISAPPOINTMENTS

Is Life a Bitch?

Sometimes life can be a bitch. You do so many things that you regret…but you never realise the lessons they teach you. After all, you do learn from mistakes.

It’s never easy to go through a break up. It’s never easy to go through a fucked up break up either. You know; the ones where you have a misunderstanding and you have a huge fight. What makes it even worse? Social networks or let’s broaden it a little; the recent developments in technology from internet to cell phones to whatever else I am not aware of.

"My ex and I broke up about 4 and a- half years back. I still read the fucked up message he sent me when we broke up. What’s even more fucked up is that the message pin points on certain personal traits of mine; some that I reflect upon when I am introspecting; some that I know are my bad qualities. It’s bad enough when you know your negative qualities, but for someone to list them out and give them to you, that sucks. Major. And at the back of my mind, I am very much aware that I have access to a list of my shitty qualities, hidden deep in some Facebook message." - An Anonymous Friend.

Technology is a major contributing factor to many misunderstandings these days. Think about it. I easily get jealous when I see a guy I have a crush on with some other chic on Facebook, posing for sultry kind of pictures; Or when he comments on her pictures. Gah. What the hell? Back off bitch! See? If this is my reaction to a freaking guy I have a crush on, how would it be if he were my boyfriend?

"The problem with our generation is that we
are so dependent on technology..."
Photograph by: Jiyoon Kim

The problem with our generation is that we are so dependent on technology rather than our own feelings. We are willing to believe pictures, messages, wallposts, tweets and what not from various social networks, but we hardly trust the person. We judge people by their pictures, statuses, notes, etc. but we never give them a chance to explain themselves.

Lesson learnt? A rather cliché one…but never judge a book by its cover. To make it more understandable for our generation, never judge a person by their Facebook profile.

Life is a bitch. That’s only a belief. If you want to make it better, life is still a bitch. But a bitch gives birth to cute puppies. Life is a bitch. But it’ll give you those happy moments when you need them. Just don’t let petty things like technology ruin it for you. Technology didn't make us, we made technology.

"We're all afraid to speak up. So instead we assume, misunderstand, and complicate everything." - @wizdom

10 things I did last night instead of studying

1. Thought about France and spoke in French to myself.
2. Stared at my blank purple wall and wondered why it never looked so interesting before.

Refer to Point Number 3

3. Searched for myself on Twitter (and also misspelled my name while doing so).
4. Played Taboo with myself.
5. Played Free cell and Solitaire on my laptop.
6. Stalked myself on Facebook.
7. Google searched whether the next day would be a holiday or not.
8. Cried because the next day is not a holiday.
9. Stared at my purple wall more.
10. Went to sleep because that's all am good at.

A conversation that led to a blog

So am on The Twitter a lot lately, and I had this conversation with a total stranger sitting in another part of the world (or so he claims) and two of his questions struck me; "What are your dreams in life?" and "What has been your memorable vacation till date?" for which I had a spontaneous reply, to both (surprisingly):

A holiday in Durban, South Africa

I have many dreams; to travel the world, become a successful media personality, make my own movies and documentaries one day, publish my own novel(s) one day, host a show perhaps, own a beautiful beach house and give something back to the needy.

My memorable vacation? My dream vacation is Greece! *smile* But one that I've already been on is Cape Town, South Africa. Beauty beyond description...from the beach to table mountain to the Cape Point to Robbin Island! It was amazing! *smile* 

The whole point of this, is that, sometimes even a stranger sitting in another part of the world can help you discover yourself. Of course I knew those are the things I want to do in life, but I never actually explained them to anyone. I may have dreamt, but today, I am determined to make this happen. I am determined. 

© Anupama Subramaniyam