Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Women should care

Rape cases, molestation and all these other cases regarding women are heard of in abundance these days. What's even more sad is that in today's world, people's way of thinking has not changed. For the society, it's always the man at fault. I am not saying that the woman is always at fault. No. But sometimes, it's better to analyse the situation and try to understand both points of views, rather than jumping to conclusions and immediately pointing fingers at the man.

(I will not quote any incidents here as it may create controversial thoughts. These are personal opinions.)

My mother has always taught me, "Whether the knife falls on the leaf or the leaf falls on the knife, it is always the leaf that will tear." The same way, whether the man abuses the woman or the woman abuses the man, it is the woman who will face the consequences.

One needs to understand the importance of the different standards of society today, especially in India. India is a huge country with a large population. This large population is sub-divided into different classes of society from the highest possible to the lowest possible. If you are a woman, sit and reflect upon this: If you wear the most inappropriate clothes and walk in front of an uneducated man or in an area that is not fully secure, with a few men who are drunk or tipsy, don't you think you will be attracting trouble? It's easy for you to immediately argue and protest with signs, "Don't tell us what to wear, tell them not to rape." Sure we could do that, but is it possible to say it to each and every man in India? To give you a better understanding, I will quote my mother's explanation.

Location: UB City, Bangalore
Photography By: Anupama Subramaniyam
"In a country like India, most of the people live together as a joint family. Therefore, it is rather difficult for the husband and wife to sleep together regularly. Especially in rural and smaller towns. Men need to satisfy themselves and do such stupid actions in order to just give themselves some satisfaction. And women dressing up the way they do in cities, and then walking around in areas where such attention isn't needed, just attracts the men even more."

Living in Bangalore, I can only give you examples from this city. If you had to wear a short skirt and a tube top and walk into UB City, I think you will be more than fine over there. The crowd is decent, the place is safe and the crowd is educated. If anything were to happen, there is security around to make sure things are settled down. If you had to wear the same clothes and walk a little down UB City into perhaps Majestic, where there is no security and the people are of lower standards, I am not saying that you will get harmed, but there are more possibilities of it happening.

Being a woman myself, I understand that we need to have the complete and total freedom to wear what we want and behave how we want to behave. But remember the leaf story; even if we don't do anything, we will get into trouble.

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